On the 14th May 1968 Mr. Joe Garagiola asked Mr. John Winston Lennon, “What are you going to do when the bubble bursts?”. Mr. J.W. Lennon replied, “I haven’t a clue… I’m still looking for the bubble.” Both these remarks present us with two highly relevant issues for life today! Mr. Alexander B. de Pfeffel Johnson has recently expounded the Theory of Bubbles and who you may include in your Bubble. But it seems that the days of The Bubble have been superceded. Has The Bubble finally burst? Or has it simply expanded? There is much room for debate.
Of course you may have been one of those people whose manner of life didn’t press you to look for a bubble. Old Gnu has been very happy in his shed and has not thought much about bubbles or re-entering the earth’s atmosphere, because he is doing things of earth-shattering importance in his shed.
British Gas had some prophetic insights of what was to befall us in 2020. Observe the following adverts from a couple of years back:
These prophetic images chime in nicely with the present notion of self-contained bubbles. Certainly, in the British Gas universe there is no chance of catching anything, apart from what the Gas Man brings in his intergalactic flying van, of which Ron’s flying Ford Anglia in the Henry Porter story was obviously a less successful prototype.
But it is clear that British Gas are thinking more in terms of independent planets than bubbles. This insight alas struck Old Gnu like lightning when he rang them up to come and look at his boiler. They gave him a time – some time between 8.30am and 5.30pm on Monday. This proves conclusively that they’re living on another planet. Furthermore, this notion of being in your own world/planet would be very upsetting for the poor day trippers to Bournemouth Beach last week.
One reporter said the scene at Bournemouth was like Armageddon. I disagree. Old Gnu visited the geographical location of Armageddon in 1980, and it was quite empty; not a soul around.
And they’re not the only ones who would be upset! If you suffer from Acrophobia [fear of heights] as Old Gnu does, you would have found these adverts terrifying. What if you fell off your tiny world!? You couldn’t for a moment guarantee that the Inifinite Probability Drive would kick in and that you would be miraculously picked up by the Heart of Gold Spaceship manned by Zaphod Beeblebrox and Trillian, as it did in the case of Arthur Dent and Ford Prefect when they were ejected from a Vogon Spaceship.
And don’t forget some researchers claim that between 3% and 6% of us suffer from Acrophobia. This figure is based on “research results that implicated a few regions with suggestive evidence for linkage on chromosomes 4q28 (LOD=2.17), 8q24 (LOD = 2.09) and 13q-q22(LOD=2.22).” Now I hope you appreciate the importance of what Old Gnu does in his shed.
Let us take heart that all bubbles must burst eventually and that will be a joyous thing. Don’t believe the heresy that is propagated in the Hymn I’m forever blowing bubbles that the inevitable bursting of bubbles is the end of hopes and dreams. Dreadful! Perfectly dreadful!! If old Gnu was still an active clergy person he would ban that hymn from his hymn book.
In the meantime, Stay Alert, and Control the Virus that kills hopes and dreams, and that will Save Lives. Believe that it is possible for the right dreams to come true – notably that British Gas have a better appointment system by now. And follow the rules even if you don’t think you need them. Jesus had no need to be baptised by John the Baptist, but he did it in order “to fulfil all righteousness”.
Vetus Pater Gnu
Musicorum et Theologia
Turris LA
XXX Mensis Iunni MMXX