My little Gnudren, 

The blest season of Advent is upon us. Together with Lent it is one of the two Penitential Seasons in the Ecclesiastical Calendar. We all know what this means. Advent stirs us into a sense of expectation.  Yes, since Wednesday 1st December we have been able to eat from our Advent Calendars each day, provided you have the ones containing chocolates. Are any other sort worth having?

This provides a beautiful balance in the Liturgical Year to Lent when many people express their penitence by giving up Chocolate. In Advent many households express their penitence, albeit unwittingly, by eating Chocolate. I am sure that the late Rev. Professor Canon Dr. Edward Bailey would have regarded this as Implicit Religion. (Look him up on the internet.) Isn’t this wonderful! The same action can mean the exact opposite in another context. Selah! While we’re at it, may I mention that Mrs. Gnu has been exhorted by medical professionals to eat chocolate and anything full of fat. (Don’t do this unless specifically directed.) She is particularly fond of these:

Alas half this packet is gone already and by this time tomorrow I have no doubt that Mrs. Gnu will have expressed her penitence utterly and completely. And alas, a second time, Old Gnu cannot partake in this act of penitence as he is restricted to a gluten free diet no doubt due to sins committed in the past. If anyone could help out by finding a similar gluten free product Old Gnu will be much obliged; he will then be able to share the spiritual disciplines of Advent with Mrs. Gnu. (Please note that it’s dark chocolate, as this expresses the gravity of our sins.)

So, my little Gnudren, Old Gnu is trusting that you have prepared yourselves suitably for Advent by listening to Bach’s Cantata no. 170 (Wachet Auf) on the Sunday before Advent and Cantatas No. 61, 63 and 36 on Advent Sunday. Shame on you if you haven’t, you cultural hooligans. (Do you think God sent our great Father Johann Sebastian among us for you to ignore his inspirational insights into the biblical texts. Fi! and shame upon you! May your piano fall to pieces next time you attempt to play it.

Have a happy Advent, treasure your families and friendships, for the Lord of Heaven and Earth took upon himself our humanity to unite us in his love. How can he love the people I don’t like very much? Perhaps this is where penitential chocolate helps. And do take a few days off after Christmas to get over it. All this being nice to everybody wears me out especially when they’re smashed out of their minds with booze than I’m banned from drinking. I can’t wait to drink the new wine of the Kingdom in heaven.

Happy Advent!

Vetus Pater Gnu
Musicorum et Theologia
Turris LA
XXIX Mensis Novembris MMXXI